![]() They vent their frustrations to me and expect me to have answers. I’m learning some people tend to communicate with me only on their own terms. Why not someone else? Why do they need my input? What makes me important? Why are they choosing to share whatever information, emotions with me. I’ve started asking people why they’re communicating with me. I have become frustrated and short tempered with those whom I’ve allow to get close because they can’t provide what I need, can’t occupy a gaping hole in my heart that was once filled by you. I’ve closed myself off from nearly everyone or pushed them away due to lack of trust and fear of vulnerability. In the past 5 years, Dad, I’ve been trying to do what you always did, “find a way.” To say it’s been hard would be understatement. It’s been 5 years since my world was turned upside down and an image was forever etched in my memory…. It’s been 5 years since I found you, slumped over a foot stool with your eyes closed and blood trickling from nose…. It’s been 5 years since I last felt your gregarious spirit…. It’s been 5 years since I’ve seen your gapped tooth smile…. It’s been 5 years since I’ve heard your voice….
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